I Can't Walk in These
When Eric and I got married, he got me a sewing machine for our first Christmas together. He did this because he knew of my great desire to be an uber domestic goddess. In my young mind, I wanted to be like the wives who cooked, sewed, and kept their homes perfect. Yet, to this day, I have never opened that sewing machine! It has traveled with us to every house we’ve turned into a home and the tape has never been ripped off the top. Why? Because although I wanted to be a domestic goddess, in reality, I’ve learned that domestic goddess stuff just isn’t me. Trying to live up to the perfection of a do-it-yourself-wife just stresses me out. It’s why I had no desire to start making cute masks when this recent pandemic hit. It’s why I don’t slave in the kitchen to take an impressive dinner to a new mom, because I’ve learned that Chick-fil-a is the healing antidote I provide with pure joy! I mean its Christian chicken! It’s clearly anointed!
God knew exactly what he was doing when he made me and stitched in my gifts. So, let’s put down the needle-and-thread, and pick up the Word.
Then Saul had his own military clothes put on David. He put a bronze helmet on David’s head and had him put on armor. David strapped his sword on over the military clothes and tried to walk, but he was not used to them. “I can’t walk in these,” David said to Saul, “I’m not used to them.” So, David took them off. Instead, he took his staff in his hand and chose five smooth stones from the wadi and put them in the pouch, in his shepherd’s bag. Then, with his sling in his hand, he approached the Philistine. 1 Samuel 17:38-40
David said, “I can’t walk in these.” The armor that had been put on him was not put on him by God, but by others. It was armor that was sized specifically for the king and meant to protect him. It wasn’t built to protect David or help him fight. It should remind us that another person’s calling will never fit us right. It will never lay across the curves of our personality or stretch around the muscles of our growth. David wanted to walk boldly and confidently. He knew he couldn’t handle the situation in someone else’s armor.
First, I love that he wasn’t intimidated to speak up about it. Instead of doing what everyone suggested, He simply said “I can’t…I can’t fight using someone else’s armor.” As in, I can’t do it your way, but I have the boldness to try it the way God called me to. God had already approved, anointed, and appointed him, so it didn’t require someone else’s approval or suggestion. Sometimes we never walk in our own giftings, because we fear what others might think if we do it our own way. Never be scared to live out what God has already given you!
Second, David also never said, “Oh, I can’t wear these, so I must not be called.” Insert eyeroll! How many times has a pity party stopped us from living out our own calling?
David never said, “I’m not strong enough to wear that armor.” It would be like us saying, “I’m not as strong as her,” or “I’m not that smart,” or “I’m not that creative,” or “I’m not that...(whatever we’ve compared ourselves to). Rather, he just dropped it, because he knew it wasn’t suited for him. We also need to drop the “I wish…” too. “I wish I had her voice.” “I wish I had her talent.” I wish…I wish…I wish, never leads to winning a battle, but “I can…” does. Afterall, “I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.”
Notice when David took off Saul’s armor, he put on the giftings that he was comfortable and confident in: His shepherds’ staff and bag. As a boy, David took special pride in the selection of his staff. It was exactly suited to his own size and strength.
The Bible doesn’t say David used the staff for anything special. Sometimes our gifts aren’t the recognizable talents that make us stand out in a crowd, but they still play a part in our calling to do great things. David just had the staff in his hand. I kind of wonder if he used the staff to maneuver rocks around in the water until he found the 5 smooth stones. Sometimes we have to move things around a bit, don’t we? David could have just picked up any ‘olé stones, but he wanted smooth stones. You see, there’s walking out a calling and there’s walking out YOUR calling. Get down to the bottom of it. Move things around until you can do what you’re called to. For me, my staff is a pen in my hand moving words around in a journal, as I pray and fight for my calling. For others, it could be moving a phone out of the way. For you (and for me), it may be moving the remote so you’re not tempted to turn on Netflix again, or all the other things we think we need that will make us happy for a moment. What if we get out of our needs, and get on our knees?
Once David had his smooth stones picked out, he placed them in his pouch – his shepherds’ bag. Just another simple gifting that is not recognized as great, but for David, it served a purpose. He had used this bag to carry his lunch and maybe some first-aid supplies, but this day it carried his weapons. No need for someone else’s armor. He had everything he needed; everything was fitted just for him. He had experience in knowing how to handle it. Only then did he approach the Philistine.
Did you catch that? Only then. Only when he was carrying that which brought strength and purpose to his calling did he move forward. When we try to move forward in the strength and purpose meant for someone else, we’ll feel stuck, depleted, and weighed down. You can’t move with the speed and accuracy of a smooth stone if you’re weighed down, trying to use someone else’s armor! “I can’t walk in these.” …So, David took them off.
It’s time to take off what’s weighing us down. Let’s take off the, “I wish I could,” and the “I don’t have time,” and the plain ole’ “I can’t,” and slip into, “Here I am Lord, use me.” When we’re open to His will, then He will make a way!
Now is not the time to be scared. You’re already gifted and called according to your purpose. No need to wear someone else’s armor to fight your battles. God already has armor designed just for you, so take off the rope of doubt and put on the belt of truth around your waist. Stop believing the lies of the enemy and put on the armor of righteousness that protects your heart. Take off laziness and put on the sandals of readiness that give your feet the willingness to go, because our dreams will never come true from the couch. Put down the bucket that’s limiting you and pick up the shield of faith. Take off the hat of easiness and put on the helmet of salvation. Lay down the stick of busyness and pick up the sword of the spirit that will lead us confidently into all our next right steps.
When you put on the armor that He designed for you, it’s easier to say, “I can walk in these.”