All In

40. It was actually really good. When I was coming upon the age of 40 I couldn’t believe it was going to be my age. I remember when I was younger, forty seemed so, well, old. Of course, my hips may hurt when the weather is weird, but I am not old. Lol! Yet, for some reason this is the age where I finally decided to step out and do more, learn more, and see myself more. I can always wonder, and have regret, for not stepping out sooner in my 20’s or 30’s, or I can just keep moving forward now. 

Now that I just turned 41 I can officially say that I’m IN my 40’s.  I’m taking that “IN” mindset and I’m actually going to live like I’m IN my 40’s. I want to be more fearless and more present. Kind of like Martha’s sister, Mary, in John chapter 12. 

“Then Mary took a pound of perfume, pure and expensive nard, anointed Jesus’s feet, and wiped his feet with her hair. So the house was filled with the fragrance of perfume.”  Mary had let her hair down and was taking the opportunity before her to actually be IN the presence of Jesus. You see, women at that time didn’t usually let their hair down in public and oil was usually poured on the head not the feet. But she wasn’t concerned with what anyone thought; she was only concerned with serving Jesus. She was IN her moment and she poured out all she had. It’s as if she was in her own world, just her and Jesus. She had tunnel vision and her light at the end of the tunnel was Jesus. In that moment she was blocking out everything else. She knew the goodness and faithfulness of him who loved her and that’s all she needed.

This is what I want: to take the opportunities before me and go all IN, as if I’m pouring it all out at the feet of Jesus. Not only remembering that he has given me capacity to do the things he has called me to do, but he has also given me capacity to do things I’ve never done before—to never stop growing. 

Mary wasn’t distracted by what others were saying around her, or who was watching, or what her sister was doing. Even when her sister was distracted and fussing, in Luke 10, because Mary wasn’t serving exactly like a woman should, Jesus responded “Mary has made the right choice, and it will not be taken from her.”  Jesus saw Mary’s heart to serve and go all IN.  

Before I can do those “pour it out” opportunities like Mary, I have to be IN the presence of His Word.  Soaking it up, so I can pour it out. That’s the “one thing” we can’t move forward without. I can’t allow myself to be distracted by tasks, that I don’t spend time with the Lord. I can’t allow myself to be distracted by what others are doing, that I don’t enjoy my time in his presence. I can’t allow myself to keep holding on to the “perfume” in my hand – I have to let go, so I can grow. 

Here’s to being IN my 40’s and being in them well.